एवेर्य्थिंग इस Different

I have no idea why my titles come up like that. The first two jarbles of words are supposed to be "Everything" and "Is."
It's really hard to put my finger on the things that are different.
But I guess if you spend as much time in other countries, on a college campus or traveling in general as I do, life will never consist of any sort of solid foundation of continuity.
I look at friendships growing, friendships dying, feelings of love disappearing almost completely, and I wonder what I can really rely on these days. I guess maybe I'm at the point in my life where change begins to sound less appealing. Or maybe it still does. The idea of traveling abroad sounds great, but the idea of leaving so much behind is terrible.
"..and eventually, the only thing they had in common were their differences..."
I don't really know what I want from life at this point. I think I'll move to Mexico next year, but is that going to be different now that I've been away from there for several years? Germany feels much further away this year than it has in the last few years. Going home is like stepping into a totally different world...or maybe like seeing a place I only know at night during the day. I'm watching my country get weaker, be it through our politicians' inability to unite for some common good or the simple passage of time, the National Enquirer is actually competing with mainstream news media, the presidential campaign is looking more like American Idol than an actual election...
I don't really know what I can rely on anymore. Money isn't always there. Friendships are ridiculously fragile. My body only has a certain amount of time.
This country appears to be on the fast track to ruin. This world will almost certainly follow suit if we people don't straighten up.
I don't know what I want, but I keep having weird images in my head of being an important leader, or launching a huge attack against AIDS and world poverty...
Beyond that, not a lot really matters to me. And I'm quite serious about that.